Showing posts with label golf. Show all posts
Showing posts with label golf. Show all posts

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

Another Golf Ball Find; Now Apparently Breeding

In looking back through the archives of Mister Tristan (the blog, not the 6-year-old human being), I see where it's been a year since my last incisive and insightful blog post on the phenomenon of golf balls found while running at places that made no sense.  

And here in another post I floated the theory that these misplaced gold balls are actually alien eggs:

The ubiquitousness of finding golf balls in unlikely places now leads me to consider some formerly outlandish theories.  I'm beginning to suspect that they are alien eggs, prepositioned, awaiting a hidden signal, and when they all hatch en masse there will be hell to pay for mankind.

Well, here's the latest find, a pair of golf balls that appear to be breeding:

[image credit Gary]

I found these balls immediately adjacent to one of my favorite 10 mile training routes (OK, I found them in the nearby Concocheague Creek while canoeing, but for sake of this blog post just go with it).

The pair of golf balls--perhaps one male and one female--appear to be linked via what can only be some sort of sex organ.   If this does not constitute irrefutable proof, I don't know what would.

Be afraid.  Be very afraid.


Thursday, August 14, 2014

Golf...Which is SO Not a Sport, in a Pickle...and Ultrarunning


I ran across this article back in April and stashed it till now:

GREENSBORO, Ga. — Golf holes the size of pizzas. Soccer balls on the back nine. A mulligan on every hole.
These are some of the measures — some would say gimmicks — that golf courses across the country have experimented with to stop people from quitting the game.
Golf has always reveled in its standards and rich tradition. But increasingly a victim of its own image and hidebound ways, golf has lost five million players in the last decade, according to the National Golf Foundation, with 20 percent of the existing 25 million golfers apt to quit in the next few years.
People under 35 have especially spurned the game, saying it takes too long to play, is too difficult to learn and has too many tiresome rules.
Go ahead and read the rest at the link; it's a pretty in-depth and decent article.  I guess my main complaint, if you will, about golf is that it takes too much time, that's the main reason it never appealed to me.

But...and that's a BIG but...instead I do a sport where the mileage is measured in tens of miles and the time is measured in hours, or even days?  What kind of sense does that make?

Well, I never said that Ultrarunning makes sense.


Thursday, October 17, 2013

Another Golf Ball...and Ultrarunning

[Image credit Gary]

I'm running out of titles for this series of posts.

Yet another golf ball found while running over the weekend. This one was embedded in a roadside embankment at right angles to the road, so it is unlikely to have so landed after having been, say, thrown from a moving vehicle.  For those of you following this theme, my last previous post on the found golf ball phenomenon is here, just a few short weeks ago.
 
As usual, no habitation nearby, no golf courses...just another mysterious golf ball.
 
For the photo I strategically placed the golf ball on my 2010 Umstead race hat, just because I felt like a heroic figure today.
 
The link to Ultrarunning, of course, is this: when these disguised alien eggs hatch, that unknown apocalypse will begin, and you will have wished that you had run more.
 

NOTE: this is one of my short and complete posts; Blogger software is still not playing well with working in draft mode.
 
 

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Another Golf Ball, This One Ominous

Another in my continuing insightful reporting on the phenomenon of golf balls found while running.  If you recall my post from last March, here, I speculated that these might actually be disguised alien eggs awaiting the master signal to hatch...and humankind may be no more.

Found last Friday, only a mile from my house as the crow flies.  Again, no homes or habitation nearby, certainly no golf courses within 10 miles:
 

[image credit Gary]
 

Why do I use the term ominous in my subject line?

Well, either Chuck Norris has been golfing again...or this "golf ball"--really an egg--has in fact hatched.  I fear for the children.

 

Thursday, July 11, 2013

Another Golf Ball...and Ultrarunning

[image credit Gary]

Well, while running last week I found yet another mysteriously placed golf ball, this one with the enigmatic logo "Titleist 3."

This latest was along the edge of a field, a good quarter mile from any habitation.  Even Tiger Woods at his prime could not drive a ball 440 yards.  So I don't see it as an errant shot of some backyard duffer.

I keep returning to this frightening theory: these are really alien eggs awaiting some activation signal, as I blogged about here.

Better say goodbye to the loved ones and finish that catch-up blitz of previous seasons of Dexter or Game of Thrones.  Or better yet, run that Ultra that you always dreamed about.  You haven't much time.

 

Friday, May 17, 2013

More Golf Ball Coverage...and Ultrarunning

[photo by Gary]


In yesterday's run along my beloved Pig Farm 10 mile route, I found a golf ball in a corn field (the corn is barely up and visibility is good).

This one was in a field beside the road, at least 1500' from the nearest house, with a scrubby woodlot on the other side of the road.  Certainly NOT a result where someone was practicing in their backyard and one got away.

Then a mile later I found the golf tee laying on the road.

Thus my incisive golf-ball-while-running coverage continues.  Last previous post was here where I postulated:

The ubiquitousness of finding golf balls in unlikely places now leads me to consider some formerly outlandish theories. I'm beginning to suspect that they are alien eggs, prepositioned, awaiting a hidden signal, and when they all hatch en masse there will be hell to pay for mankind.

The link to Ultrarunning?  None, other than I was running when I found these artifacts.  Plus Ultrarunning is a sport; golf is not.  Case closed.

 

Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Another Golf Ball...and a Frightening Theory

This one was found by Mister Tristan (the 5-year old human being, not the blog) as we took a short stroll along the Norfolk Southern railroad tracks about half a mile from my home:

 
 
As is the case with nearly all of my previous golf-ball-find reporting, this one was not near any homes and certainly nowhere near any golf course.
 
The ubiquitousness of finding golf balls in unlikely places now leads me to consider some formerly outlandish theories.  I'm beginning to suspect that they are alien eggs, prepositioned, awaiting a hidden signal, and when they all hatch en masse there will be hell to pay for mankind.
 
My last installment of golf ball find coverage was here.  And it was less than 2 weeks ago.  The alien apocalypse may be nearer than we think.
 
 

Thursday, February 28, 2013

Another Golf Ball...and Ultrarunning

[image credit Gary]

Well, it's been about 10 weeks since I found a golf ball while running, last reported on here.  On this run on Monday I also found a dollar bill, at a separate location, so I was very blessed indeed.

For a caption, I can employ the very same text I used in December, only changing the day of the week and the name of the road:

Found on Tuesday Monday along the Clay Hill Road Antrim Church Road, just inside the fence line of a cattle pasture. A couple homes semi-close but nothing right there...other than the road and the pasture. No proximate back yard that could have served as a practice tee. And no golf courses within 5 miles.

Again, the proliferation of lost golf balls mystifies me...yet I get a strange tingle, a sort of manly surge, whenever I find one.  I look around furtively to see if anyone's watching before I pocket my prize; I put it in my breast pocket, close to my heart.  I wonder how a golf club would feel in my hands, how it'd feel to tee off.  How I would speed across the course in my golf cart, passing sand traps and trees as though they were standing still.  I'd get out of my cart at the green, and walk reverently across the smooth, silky, luxurious living carpet.  Then I'd putt, and putt again and again, until I just didn't want to putt anymore.

Then I shake my head to clear the delirium and resume my Ultrarunning training.

 

Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Still Another Golf Ball Found While Running

[photo by Gary]

Found on Tuesday along the Clay Hill Road, just inside the fence line of a cattle pasture. A couple homes semi-close but nothing right there...other than the road and the pasture.  No proximate back yard that could have served as a practice tee.  And no golf courses within 5 miles.

At any rate, I am again pleased to have the opportunity to continue with my insightful, hard-hitting series about golf balls found while running.  Previous installments are here, here, here, here, and here.

Couple theories: Perhaps golf balls are actually living entities that escape and make their way into rural areas to try to, well, blend in or something.  Or maybe teenagers stock up on golf balls and toss them from moving vehicles at road signs.  Maybe cows have taken up the sport.

I eagerly await the next find.  For one thing is certain: there will be a next found golf ball.  Of that I am certain.

 

Friday, July 13, 2012

Yet Another Golf Ball...and Ultrarunning


[photo by Gary]

Regular readers have no doubt been impressed by my superb coverage of the subject of finding golf balls along my running routes.  See here, here, here and here for previous in-depth reporting.

Not near any golf courses, or houses, mind you; rather, these spheres are found basically in the middle of nowhere (i.e., along lightly traveled rural roads.

Well, here's yet another installment.  The golf ball pictured here came from a corn field along Hades Church Road (I love that name!).  No houses near, certainly no golf courses or driving ranges within 10 miles.  Just laying there on the edge of a muddy field.

The ball appears to have originally come from a golf establishment such as a driving range.  The name imprinted on the ball is unfortunate in that it immediately conjures up scatological images.  In the interests of science I actually did test the golf ball to see if it floated (no, I used a coffee cup, NOT the toilet!).

It did in fact float, but just barely, as its mass was just a smidge less than the specific gravity of water.  I would have to think that this floating ball would have very different driving characteristics than "normal" golf balls, which sink in water.

Oh, and the link to Ultrarunning?  We back country runners do admittedly have gear and technologies apropos to our sport, but I gotta believe that it's a LOT more simple that golf technology.  Plus more fun!

Friday, May 18, 2012

More Golf Balls...and Ultrarunning


[photo by Gary]

Well, it happened yet again--finding another golf ball (2, actually) in a cornfield along a rural road, away from any homes.

My previous in-depth coverage of this phenomenon is here and here.

I could not resist busting my running buddy, Jack, who also is a serious golfer, by spinning this find and photo into a Chuck Norris joke.  Jack hates Chuck Norris jokes and doesn't think they are funny.  He is wrong--the real joke is that they are not funny...and that's what makes them funny.  Or something.  Anyway, on to the joke:





Speaking of balls, Jack won a contest thru Golf Digest to play  a 1-hole match with Chuck Norris.  Jack’s ball is pictured on the left.  He considers it his lucky ball since he has used it with some success and without losing it since before the winter.  Jack went first and wound up making par on the hole.




Chuck’s first shot was headed for a hole-in-one (of course) when a squirrel ran out at the last moment and stole the rolling ball only 6” from the cup.  The new ball Chuck used just for the 6” tap-in is also pictured, on the right. 




The squirrel, unfortunately, did not survive.
 



The link to Ultrarunning?  The day I find a golf ball along the Appalachian Trail may indicate it's time to retire from the sport.

 

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Golf Balls, Again...and Ultrarunning



Well, it's happened again--finding yet another golf ball while running along a rural road where no self-respecting golf ball ought to be.

I've previously noted this phenomenon here, and I still have no cogent explanation.  But it happens enough--say 5 or 6 times a year--to seem to be a bit more than random chance.

I'm glad that I took up Ultrarunning first, as there would be no time in my life for golf as well.  Both sports (and in the case of golf I use the term "sport" extremely loosely) are notorious time suckers.

 

Friday, October 28, 2011

Chuck Norris Has Been Golfing Again...and Ultrarunning

I can't tell you how many golf balls I have found over the years while running, but it's probably dozens.  I'm talking, far, far, from any golf course.  It's as though golfers are secretly teeing off, to get their jollies, I guess.

Here is the latest installment.

 
I will say that I have never found one on a trail, only roads, so score one for the Ultrarunners.

 

Friday, May 27, 2011

REPOST: Golf Balls, Catnip, and Running

While I am down after arm surgery and can't type, I am recycling some posts from a year ago.

This from 27 May 2010, here (you'll need to click back to see any images, I could not easily or quickly insert them in this re-post):

This past weekend I did not make it out for an Appalachian Trail run as I had hoped. We were away Friday and Saturday, and Sunday seemed just too good an opportunity to catch up on some sleep that an AT run just wasn’t feasible.

I did run 10 miles on local roads, and out in the middle of nowhere I found a golf ball, in perfect shape. I carried it home and gave it to a golfing buddy, even though, as we all know (just like NASCAR), golf is not a real sport. I’ve previously found golf balls on runs far away from any course, so all I can figure is that golf aficionados must be teeing off from their yards to practice their drives…or they are tossing them from moving cars.

Neither explanation seems too plausible.

The other thing I bought home was some catnip for the cats. I don’t need to plant any in my yard as it grows profusely around here on roadsides. It seems mighty strange to see a cat munching on a green plant, but munch they do, eagerly.

By the way, the run went OK, but barely. The skies were threatening when I went out and sure enough, about 5 miles out I got drenched, although that was no big deal since it was not cold. The main reason for an unsatisfactory run was that I just had nothing in my legs.

My running has been majorly flat and uninspired since completing the Umstead 100 Mile Endurance Run on 27 March. I’ve experienced similar letdowns subsequent to some major effort and I realize that this, too, shall pass. I need to apply for another race—there’s nothing like a commitment and an actual date on the calendar to focus one’s mind and body.

Mmmmmm...good!


(photos by Gary)

Monday, February 21, 2011

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Golf Balls, Catnip, and Running

This past weekend I did not make it out for an Appalachian Trail run as I had hoped. We were away Friday and Saturday, and Sunday seemed just too good an opportunity to catch up on some sleep that an AT run just wasn’t feasible.

I did run 10 miles on local roads, and out in the middle of nowhere I found a golf ball, in perfect shape. I carried it home and gave it to a golfing buddy, even though, as we all know (just like NASCAR), golf is not a real sport. I’ve previously found golf balls on runs far away from any course, so all I can figure is that golf aficionados must be teeing off from their yards to practice their drives…or they are tossing them from moving cars.

Neither explanation seems too plausible.

The other thing I bought home was some catnip for the cats. I don’t need to plant any in my yard as it grows profusely around here on roadsides. It seems mighty strange to see a cat munching on a green plant, but munch they do, eagerly.

By the way, the run went OK, but barely. The skies were threatening when I went out and sure enough, about 5 miles out I got drenched, although that was no big deal since it was not cold. The main reason for an unsatisfactory run was that I just had nothing in my legs.

My running has been majorly flat and uninspired since completing the Umstead 100 Mile Endurance Run on 27 March. I’ve experienced similar letdowns subsequent to some major effort and I realize that this, too, shall pass. I need to apply for another race—there’s nothing like a commitment and an actual date on the calendar to focus one’s mind and body.


Mmmmmm...good!
(photos by Gary)