Friday, August 2, 2013

Gary's Relationship Advice

Yesterday's post about the wisdom of old female elephants got me to thinking about relationships. Nothing to do with Ultrarunning here.

This whole age/experience thing kinda dovetails with my theory of relationships. In today's culture young lovers often take things to the next level way too fast: dating, sex, moving in together, marriage (or not).

I've always thought that the key ingredient that seems to be missing is time: you need to be with someone for months, not weeks, so you can see them at their best and at their worst, in sickness and in health, so to speak, before you commit.  You need to see them when they are up, when they are down, how they handle pressure and adversity and joy and sorrow...before you are inextricably linked.

You don't want to be learning your loved one's basic traits after you've pulled the commitment trigger, because you may not like what you see.

Which brings me back to the value of just spending time, unrushed, unhurried time.  If your loved one holds up well (i.e., is a decent human being under most circumstances), then you may know that he or she is the one.


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